Sunday, January 27, 2008

Damn horny...

Orgasms since last entry: Seven. That's better!

I had intended to make this a reasonably long entry, discussing differences in male and female attitudes to sex (or at least some of my thoughts on such things) - but I just concluded a three-hour instant-message-type chat to my beloved, and I'm horny!!!!! So the rest of you can just wait, I'm off to spend some quality time with a handful of something oil-based.

Oh, and in the meantime I've added a new window. The running orgasm total for this year. To be increasing very, very soon...

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Testing... testing... one, two, threesome

Orgasms since last entry: Zero (!) - I hate being ill... :-P

In any case, I finally got around to doing my purity score for the start of the year. Just like Queenie I'll be doing it again at the end of the year for a comparison. I do take slight issue with
the 'Sex drive' section, since many of the questions seem to be about how often your libido overrides your morality, rather than simply how often you libido asserts itself. But considering that I got below average purity in all categories, I can't really complain! :-)

Your Ultimate Purity Test 2.0 Score Is...
Your Score:Average For All UsersAverage For All Males
(7632 total)
Dating15.38%34.13%29.17%Gone steady
Self-Lovin'30.3%60.91%46.47%When I think about you - or anyone - I touch myself
Shamelessness59.68%77.35%73.97%It takes a couple of drinks
Sex Drive66.67%75.02%67.67%A fool for love, but not always
Straightness3.7%39.25%32.72%Knows the other body type like a map
Gayness55.56%78.15%74.79%Had that experience at camp
Dominant58.33%86.7%81.54%Not afraid to tie the knot
Submissive53.97%87.07%86.12%Bound and gagged a few times
Fucking Sick65.31%89.83%87.35%Dipped into depravity
Total Score48.48%73.74%68.51%
Take The Ultimate Purity Test 2.0
and see how you match up!


(By The Ferrett)


So now we all know where I stand.

Monday, January 21, 2008

The Phone-domme Menace

Orgasms since last entry: Two (more on that later)

"You totally manipulated me."
"Really? But I gave you a chance to get away."
"But think about what it said in The Game, about overcoming last-minute resistance. "
"Oh my... you're so right."
It was early morning. I'd been struck with a realisation while reading my lover's account of the first time she sucked me off, and couldn't wait to share it with her. Instinctively, it seemed, she had pulled off a trick that pick-up artists have had to work out slowly by experimentation and critical analysis; get someone worked up, present them with the promise of sex, then offer to stop, and their resistance will crumble. Knowing you can't have something - anything - just makes you want it more. I was just as succeptible to manipulation as the next person, and my lover had exploited that without even doing it consciously.
"The thing is, once I realised it, I also realised there's a bunch of other incidents where the same is true. Things I was reluctant to do at first, and you've just managed to override my hesitation. I am totally your bitch."
The voice on the other end of the phone giggled.
"No," I continued "it's wonderful. You've been dominating me for years, and it's such a gentle, smooth, subtle domination that I didn't even realise it. I'm your pussy-slave. And I really like it."
"Well, maybe that's the reason I've never felt the need to physically dominate you."
"Perhaps, although I hope we can do some of that sometime too." I replied, a distinct grin creeping into my voice.
"Sure, just as long as we get to swap roles from time to time."

My beloved and I have had this ongoing discussion about dominance and submission in our relationship for some time now. For the most part, our sex life is quite vanilla, leaving aside the amount of sex we have (when we're not seperated by work commitments) and the tendency to invent new sex toys and test them out on each other. We have an extensive wish-list of group encounters, voyeuristic acts, and locations to check off. But normally we're just too horny and too desperate to fuck each other to be bothered dressing up, setting a scene, or doing any other role-playing stuff. None-the-less we've been gradually working more domination and submission into our discussions lately. I think everyone has a passion for powerplay in sex - some of us just acknowledge it and embrace it more than others. I certainly do. Even though I like the idea of taking charge sometime, and have been known to subject my lover to some extremely restrictive (and orgasm-inducing) situations, the thought of a woman bending me to her will has always gotten my motor running. There's something about the idea of a beautiful woman making me want to do as she commands that drives me wild. So the realisation that I'm somewhat pussy-whipped was actually pretty satisfying.

It became even more satisfying later than day, when I rang my beloved again. This time, I had intended to have a platonic discussion, to balance out the sex-talk from earlier. It didn't last...
"You know I love it when you call me 'slave'," I whispered as my body arched with excitement.
"I know," she replied "I own you."
Once again my body writhed. Her words were a pavlovian stimulus, arousing me as much as the touch of her hands, or her tongue, in another time and place. My free hand rubbed across my crotch, unbidden.
"I want you to cum for me, slave."
I unzipped my trousers and pulled them down from my swelling cock. My fingers and thumb wrapped around the shaft and began stroking.
"Get yourself nice and hard, but don't cum until I tell you."
"Yes mistress, I understand!"
I continued to stroke myself, as we discussed my state of arousal. Every time she referred to me as her slave I felt my cock become a little harder. Truly the brain is the most erogenous organ... Before long I could feel the base of my cock pulsing, the premonitions of an impending orgasm. Again she ordered me not to go over the edge. I softened my touch. She described herself hovering over me, brushing her eager pussy lips against the head of my cock. I could imagine the wetness trickling over my shaft, like a bead of sweat, running down to tickle my scrotum. She described herself sliding the head of my cock into herself, then thrusting down all the way, taking me right in to the hilt. I hung on every word. She described herself clenching her muscles around me, sliding off again, until only my head was inside her, then thrusting back onto me. And then she ordered me to cum.
A spray of white liquid shot into the air, cascading back down over my thighs, my tummy, and my hand. I writhed and gasped as pulse after pulse of pleasure shot up through the length of my erection. On the other end of the phone, I could hear my lover's satisfaction at the sounds of my release. I hoped my mistress was pleased with my performance. Aftershocks racked my body as the nerve endings tried to fire again, to summon forth another orgasm, but I was too spent. My mind slipped into endorphin delirium, as I sagged into the chair.

Life has been interesting recently, discovering that I have this pavlovian reaction to a certain tone of voice, a certain choice of words, that my partner can conjure up so effortlessly. We chatted for a little while about how far we would like to take this aspect of our relationship. For certain, once work sends me back home and we can be together again, we will relish the chance to explore this face-to-face.

And then I noticed that my foreskin was stuck closed with dried cum, forming what looked for all the world like a muppet's mouth - in a state of irritation, no less! It was an amusing sight, and I wondered what had made him so annoyed, considering what a good time he'd just had. I peeled my foreskin back, exposing the head, like some enormous tongue or bloated pair of tonsils.

You know you've had a brain-frying orgasm when you sing ...

The singing penis song
Oh, I'm a singing penis,
I sing the whole day long.
Yes I'm a jolly singing penis,
and I sing the singing penis song.

I'm an opera-singing penis,
I can sing a very high note.
And when I open my mouth so wide,
my head comes outta my throat!

Women may have multiple orgasms, but their genitalia don't lend themselves to pantomime in quite the same way as men's!


Saturday, January 19, 2008

Keeping myself busy...

Orgasms since last entry: Six

Just a quick entry today. I've managed to catch up on the backlog of posts, and now can start posting here properly... Also managed to get a cold, after staying out too late on thursday night practicing pickup skills at a local club. With mixed success :-) I had been hoping to go out for more practice tonight, but I think an early night is in order instead. Oh well, having a runny nose does suppress the libido, unfortunately, but I still enjoyed myself earlier today looking at home videos of my beloved getting a good solid rodgering from a sex machine... I also got a kick out of Queenie's recounting of the famous suck-my-brains-out-through-my-cock incident, on her blog today.

Okay, next time I promise I'll have more to say about male multiple orgasms, and get around to posting my purity test results.

(backlog: Jan 14th 2008) Opportunities lost and found

Orgasms since last entry: Eleven

Well, it's been a while since my last entry, as I've been travelling. On the plus side it's a lot of fun, but on the downside it can mean not getting enough sleep, which I find is a libido-killer.

Astute readers will note that my orgasm-count for the year is somewhat less than that of my beloved. This I ascribe to me being male, and her being female, and that whole "multiple orgasm" thing that women can do. So for this entry, I want to talk a bit about maleness and sex. And how we men seem to have wasted the chance to make the most of what we're born with.

Any guy who thinks about sex must, from time to time, have wondered why it is that women get the multiple orgasms but men don't. Certainly, and tragically, there are a number of women who'd be happy to just have AN orgasm, but the fact remains that multi-orgasmic women are achieving something that appears to be beyond the abilities of any man. And that seems a bit unfair, to anyone born with a Y-chromosome.

The really funny thing about this situation is that for decades, women have been taught to explore their sexuality, to learn about their bodies, to aim to achieve more sexual satisfaction. And they've succeeded. Women buy vibrators, they read magazine articles about how to have better orgasms, they experiment with bisexuality... according to More Hot Sex by Tracey Cox, the number of women who experience multiple orgasms is now approaching 50%, up from a mere 14% several decades ago when people like Masters and Johnson started paying attention.

But what about men?

Well, here's the point I'm getting at: we men have done a lousy job of keeping up with the women. We usually don't talk about sex with each other. We rarely discuss masturbation, or anything that may be perceived as an "inadequacy" in our sexual performance. And so we seem to have wasted the chance to figure out how to have more pleasure ourselves.

Case in point: Walk into a bookshop and search through the books about sexual health (NOT the porno magazines! Not that there's anything wrong with that, I'm just focussing on something else for a second...). The chances are good that if you find a book claiming to teach men to be multi-orgasmic, it'll be based on tantric mumbo-jumbo, and start carrying on about kundalini energy and chakras and who-knows-what-else.

Now just imagine the reaction if someone tried to publish a book about female sexuality that said something like "women bleed once a month because their bodies become infested by evil spirits, and they must be avoided at this time or else they will bring bad luck".

Superstitious clap-trap. Nonsense that has no place in the twenty-first century. So why are men allowing themselves to be peddled a bunch of bronze-age superstition, and where are the scientific studies into male sexual response, focussing on letting men accomplish what an ever-increasing number of women can?

Well, I'm glad to say there's some hope. According to wikipedia, there are indications that the refractory period (the period after orgasm when your dick goes floppy) can be reduced or eliminated by affecting the amount of the hormone prolactin in the bloodstream. And thankfully, some other men seem to be getting the idea that talking about your nether regions is a good idea. Earlier today I came across the titilatingly-titled Todger Talk.

However, leaving aside drug-based hormone manipulation, I've also heard tell of some guys who can avoid going floppy after orgasm, and continue having more sex and more orgasms. And not just 14-year-olds! Sometimes it's an ability they've always had. Sometimes they discover it by accident with the right partner. But either way it seems that the male genitalia has more tricks up its sleeve than we thought, and we have been missing out by letting the tantric mumbo-jumbo stand in the way of proper experimental investigation. And by not being frank and open with each other, and our partners, about how we men compare to each other in the bedroom.

And we men have nobody to blame for this but ourselves.

So let me start the ball rolling, by talking about what I experience in the potentially-more-than-one-orgasm department. From time to time I've had my penis remain hard for several minutes after orgasming and withdrawing. Unfortunately this business of changing condoms creates enough stress to kill the mood and make him go floppy. But I've decided to experiemnt with stimulation, fantasies, and whatever else I can manage to see if I can make this happen reliably, not just randomly.

This morning I brought myself to two fully ejaculatory orgasms, about five minutes apart, with partial (not total) loss of my erection in between. The second orgasm was definitely more pleasurable, producing the kind of buzz that women seem to report from the endorphin rush of multiple orgasms. That seems like a decent start to an ongoing project :-) I aim to get that partial loss of my erection reduced and eventually elimnated. And increase the number of orgasms beyond two. I'm not sure how yet, but I'll let you know how it progresses...

(backlog: Jan 5th 2008) The eyes have it...

Okay, here's the first real entry...

Orgasm count to date this year: 5

I was on a bus today and got talking to a guy. It took a while to sink in, but gradually I realised that he had incredibly appealing eyes. There was just something about them that got me going. And once that happened, I started noticing that he had quite a nice body.

I definitely go for girls more often, but it's good to know the man-love part of my libio hasn't faded away from lack of use :-)

But I think it may take a bit more practice before I have the guts to make a move on a guy I met on the bus. When he's with his girlfriend... Maybe I should add that to my list of goals for the year.

(backlog: Jan 4th 2008) You have to start somewhere...

I can't say I have a boring sex life. But I must admit that I've focussed on quality, and variety, rather than quantity. I have probably tried more experiemntal stuff, in terms of fetishes, bondage, pegging, and what have you, than quite a lot of people. I can't really complain.

Still, it came as a rude shock when my primary partner and I compared how many people we'd had it off with. In the time we've been together, she's acquired almost three times as many partners/fuckbuddies as I have in my whole adult life. And that makes me wonder, why?

For some time I've speculated that women have an easier time picking up than guys do. If a women propositions a guy for sex, the chances seem pretty good that he'll say yes, if he's not otherwise attached. A guy doing the same runs the risk of a facefull of mace and a restraining order - or at least, that's what the 1990s told us.

And yet, I wonder if that's right? Have I not had as many partners as Queenie because I thought I'd offend or upset women by being too forward? Did society and my natural tendency to be nice to others stand in the way of shagging everyone I want to?

Or am I just a big chicken?

Well, this year I'm going to find out. I recently read Neil Strauss' book The Game, and it was amazing how much struck a chord with me. I finally understood why all the guys like me got completely overlooked by all the beautiful girls in high school, who flocked around the guys with IQs that could be counted on the fingers of one foot!

So this year I'm going to find out what I have to change about myself in order to get laid as much as I want. And can I do it while still being a nice guy?

This journal will be a combination of sexual adventures (I hope), philosophising about the place of sex in society, and anything else that seems to fit in. Since it's a counterpart to Queenie's journal, it will follow a similar format, complete with orgasm count, my purity score, and explicit content (you have been warned). But I'm still learning how to let my inner slut out, so I'll probably be focussing more on idle thougts than field reports for a while.

A bit about me; I'm athletic and well-educated, people often tell me I'm attractive, and I'm in a polyamorous relationship. I'm interested in most things sexual, especially ways to make it better (like any other physical activity, exercise and practice make a big difference), and have a list of things to do this year. One of these is more experience with same-sex encounters. I've had a small amount of experience there, but I think it's time to get more. As the discussion above suggests, I'm also keen to have more sex with a wider range of partners, including more group encounters, rather than the comfort zone of long-term relationships (even though I find those I have had to be deeply fulfilling).

Okay, that's the introduction. More entries will come along in the near future. Hopefully they'll be interesting ;-)